Being the sensitive soul that I am, when a friend wrote about the possibility of her ex-boyfriend’s spirit stopping her from over-dosing in her bathroom, I responded that if I were a ghost I would definitely watch people in the shower. I also reminded her that being older, the odds were in my favor that I would be the first to shed my mortal coil amongst our friends, ensuring me plenty of viewing opportunities.

Apparently this moved many people, and they united on Facebook to form the group Showering for Tombstone. Showering for Tombstone is a non-profit organization dedicated to making sure my afterlife doesn’t get boring. All it takes is fifteen minutes of steaming naughty bits per day to feed a hungry spirit. So please show your support of my infinite voyeurism by joining Showering for Tombstone today–because eternity is a long fucking time.

To those I hold dear, I ask only this: after I am gone, shower in remembrance of me. May my invisible leer give you comfort, and the next time the shower curtain reaches out to grope you, think fondly of your Dirty Uncle Tombstone.

P.S. Ladies, if you would like to ensure that your showering practices meet my strict quality control standards, feel free to send any video or photographic documentation to tombstone@dangerouskids.net. Or if you live in the Portland area, I might be willing to make a house call, assuming refreshments are served (either before, after, or during).